Needles and eyepatches

Sunday the 15th September 2013 . This will be one of those days that I will always remember in Korea and an experience that I feel is worth documenting. On Sunday morning I woke up to find that my left eye had completely changed shape and resembled something similar to the shape of an Asian eye . Now I have always thought that  Asian eyes are beautiful and have often wondered if I should go under the knife to get my own pair. However that was not going to happen on Sunday. What was about to happen was something far more scary than embarking on a plastic surgery advenutre. Feeling anxious about the state of my eye I attempted to phone some hospitals in the area only to discover that Sunday happens to be the only day of rest for Koreans. So places that we regard as highly imporant and expect to be open on a Sunday are infact closed the same goes for pharmacies. Great start to the day. Some friends suggested that I go to Dongguk University hospital as that is one of the few hospitals that are open 24 hours a day. Feeling extremely embarrased about my eye I put my sunglasses on acted as cool as I possibly could and went off to the hospital.

Now for those of you who dont know me . Hospitals and I have never had a good relationship. I hate them at the best of times , so when I arrived at the hospital and was sent to the emergency room and was greeted by people on drips and saw babies with broken limbs that was it , that was me gone. Being brave was not gonna happen and the tears started flowing. I already stuck out like a sore thumb being the only waygook in the place with a bulging retarded eye , so bringing on the waterworks did not help my cause. Evetually a very nice Doctor came over and escorted me to another area of the hospital . It was dead quiet , no one was around . I suddenly felt like I had been transported into some sick twisted hospital horror movie.


Eventually we got to a room and I was introduced to another doctor . An eye specialist. I suddenly felt far more relieved and relaxed .. pfft little did I realise that 10 minutes later this dude would be practically disecting my eyeball. Trying his best to speak englissh he informed me that I had a stye and that there were two options. I could leave it and let it heal in its own time or he could do a small procedure which would remove the infection straight away. Taking into account that I would be embarking on my 5 day island adventure to Jeju on Wednesday ( a holiday that I have been looking forward to all year I might add ) and that I would not want to deal with a manky eye I told the doc to do the procedure. We moved into his operation room that was full of sharp metal instruments and needles. I suddenly was overcome with fear. It suddenly hit me that I was placing my trust and my precious poo brown eye in the hands of a doctor that I did not know and that could barely speak english. All that came to mind was the movie SAW. That horrific horror movie that is all about having body parts removed. Yes perhaps I was being a bit dramatic but when you are on your own with no one by your side for support in a foreign country in a foreign hospital one can only assume the worst. He placed a giant sheet over my face which had two small holes for my eyes. Great now I really had no control of the situation . My palms started sweating , my legs were shaking and I couldnt stop crying. And then the best part arrived . " I shall stick a needle in your eyelid to reduce the pain" Well feck theres an oxymoron and a half. Yes lets stick needles in my eyes because that will obviously not be painful. If there was ever a time I needed to hold someones hand .. this would have been it . " I will have to give you two more injections just to be safe " Great ... yes you carry on sticking needles in my eyes whilst I just die here slowly. Totes chilled. After a sum total of three injections in my eye I heard the clattering of the instruments above my eye. I was unable to feel anything though due to the local anesthetic .... and no this did not make it any better because I felt like I had no control over my body a very frightening situation for any control freak to be in.

 After 30 minutes of  needles and instruments in my eye it was over... thank God. I looked in the mirror. One giant brown patch over my left eye."Great " as if I dont get enough stares in this dam country with my vampire white skin and red hair already I would now have an added feature on display for the whole of Gyeongju to enjoy. I attempted to use my sunglasses to cover up the patch... but when you live in a society where image is everything and you are constantly being checked out by everyone sunglesses do very little to help the situtaion. I went downstairs to pay , not expecting to pay much as I have been told Korean medical is very cheap ..... cheap when you in a normal hospital during the week maybe ... but on a Sunday .... oh no .... 68 000 won later and what did I get for that price .. a bruised , bulging buggered up eye ! On went the waterworks again. I went over to the pharmacy to collect the perscribed eye drops and creams that the doctor has suggested. Once again the language barrier got in the way and I had no clue what the lady was on about . I was so over everything at this point I took the stuff got in a cab and went home and tried to process what had just happened. I have never felt so alone and hopeless in my life.


Yesterday taught me two things about myself and life.

Although the procedure was really scary and painful I think it was more the fact that I was alone and that I had no one there telling me it would be ok. I realised that this is how life is. We so often expect people to be there for us in times of trouble but the bottom line is that we are alone in this world and we are going to be faced with so many situations in our lives where we will have to deal with things on our own. Family are one of the few things we can really rely on in this life and some people dont even have that luxury. Just being able to speak to my family yesterday made all the difference .

Walking around with only being able to use one eye got me thinking about the challenges that blind people have to face on a daily basis. Here was I complaining and bitching because I looked like a freak and felt uncomfortable whilst millions of people around the world at that very same moment were struggling with a life challenge of having no vision at all. Then I thought about the movie slumdog millonaire and that utterly heart breaking scene where the childrens eyes are taken out . A very real thing that happens all the time in India. Shivers ran down my body just thinking about what those children have to endure. Imagine never seeing your beautiful city again , the smile on a friends face , a sunrise , a sunset .... thinking about all of this made me realise how pathetic I was being. Yes I was in a lot of pain , felt terrible and had an eye that looked gross but it was all temporary and within a few days it will hopefully heal.

So im not going to feel sorry for myself any more because I have two eyes that can see.. even if the one isn't looking as sexy as it usally does I can see and that is something that I will never take for granted again. On Wednedsay morning I will leave for Jeju Island with my friends for five days of fun. I have accepted that my eye will probably not be back to normal but I will be able to see this piece of paradise and that in itself is a blessing. <3

Some advice for anyone who may be faced with a similar problem in the future.

* If you have a stye or eye infection use warm water and a cloth or even better tea bags. Place over your eyes for 10 minutes about 3 times a day to relive swelling and bruising. If it continues go to a Doctor

* Most hospitals are closed on a sunday in Korea. If you are in Gyeongju Dongguk Hospital emergency room is open but be prepared to dish out a lot of won.

*Take someone with you to the hospital . Preferably someone who speaks Korean otherwise just anyone who you feel will be a support for you.